cute pic of the rugby gang

pat benetar rocked!!

i took pics on my cell phone and unfortunately she only looks like a blob of light…so here are some pics of a few of us.  everyone was spread out so i didn’t get pics of many people.

which is which?

roosevelt has lost so much weight you can barely tell them apart!  Ro is a little taller but other than that they are close to the same size!  way to go roosevelt!

sexy, model, windblown look

great book

you should read it if you get a chance.  it is about a girl who is raped and murdered and is told from her perspective looking down at her family dealing with everything….very different, but a good read!

great book

you should read it if you get a chance.  it is about a girl who is raped and murdered and is told from her perspective looking down at her family dealing with everything….very different, but a good read!

mommy

Not to copy off of Leigh but it did seem to be a cleansing activity for her to talk about her mom’s death.  My mom died 8 years ago today.  She was 45.  It was the week after mother’s day.  I had stayed in Fayetteville for mother’s day weekend to make some money delivering flowers to everyone else’s moms so I decided to go home the weekend after and give my dad and sister a little break from taking care of her.  She had a brain disease called "picks disease" which attacks different parts of the brain in no particular order.  It can take away the ability to talk or walk or even breathe.  It happens in a random order and you just never know what you are going to get.  It is similar to Alzheimer’s but a little different.  My mom’s whole personality had changed and month by month she became less and less capable and "with it".  She was not herself for several years and was like a child at times.  She had no filter….she told people anything and everything. She told big people they were fat and told black guys to turn their hats around and pull up their pants….it was very amusing at times as you can imagine.  But back to the story.  I came home to Pine Bluff and my sister went to spend the weekend in little rock with her then fiancé and now husband.  Sunday morning my dad got up to go running and I got in bed with my mom.  She couldn’t really be left alone.  When I woke up later that morning she was cuddled up to me asleep, I thought…..but as I rolled her over I realized that she was not asleep.  I just remember screaming and panicking.  I didn’t not know CPR and was thinking I needed to try and save her, but it was just too late.  She died sometime in the early morning after my dad left.  I was horrified at first and I made Kelley, (my girlfriend at the time), call and tell my sister.  I couldn’t find my dad because he didn’t have his cell phone on him while running so the cops had to go driving around to find him.  It was all such a blur and so hectic that I never really had a chance to deal with it.  As time has gone by I realize how very lucky I am to have been with my mom in her last moments.  I could never have been the one to take care of her on a daily basis like my sister and my sister could not have handled waking up to her being dead.  I really feel like we did exactly what we were supposed to do and what we could each handle. 

When my mom wasn’t sick she was the most caring person I knew.  Most of my friends came to her to talk instead of their own moms.  She was such a cool mom, but not the kind that would let you drink with her or anything.  She had rules and you just didn’t break them.  You could tell her things and not feel silly.  She was the best shopping buddy ever.  We would go try on every outfit and never buy anything.  She cried at sad movies and commercials and tried to sing along with the radio using her "choir" voice.  She would get to talking and totally miss her exit while driving.  And speaking of driving, you think I drive badly??? Well I got it from her!!  She was just an extraordinary, beautiful lady.  She kept her fingernails so neat and pretty and had the most beautiful hands and feet.  She was so proper at times too….no burping at the dinner table or we had to put a quarter in the jar!  I loved having her braid my hair when it was long and at night before bed she would always play with my hair.  I know if she were alive today we would be the best of friends.  I get so profoundly sad when i see a woman my age with her mom out shopping.  I am really missing out on some great mother daughter time…..I think that makes me want to have kids even more so I can be like her and remember more about our times together. 

mommy

Not to copy off of Leigh but it did seem to be a cleansing activity for her to talk about her mom’s death.  My mom died 8 years ago today.  She was 45.  It was the week after mother’s day.  I had stayed in Fayetteville for mother’s day weekend to make some money delivering flowers to everyone else’s moms so I decided to go home the weekend after and give my dad and sister a little break from taking care of her.  She had a brain disease called "picks disease" which attacks different parts of the brain in no particular order.  It can take away the ability to talk or walk or even breathe.  It happens in a random order and you just never know what you are going to get.  It is similar to Alzheimer’s but a little different.  My mom’s whole personality had changed and month by month she became less and less capable and "with it".  She was not herself for several years and was like a child at times.  She had no filter….she told people anything and everything. She told big people they were fat and told black guys to turn their hats around and pull up their pants….it was very amusing at times as you can imagine.  But back to the story.  I came home to Pine Bluff and my sister went to spend the weekend in little rock with her then fiancé and now husband.  Sunday morning my dad got up to go running and I got in bed with my mom.  She couldn’t really be left alone.  When I woke up later that morning she was cuddled up to me asleep, I thought…..but as I rolled her over I realized that she was not asleep.  I just remember screaming and panicking.  I didn’t not know CPR and was thinking I needed to try and save her, but it was just too late.  She died sometime in the early morning after my dad left.  I was horrified at first and I made Kelley, (my girlfriend at the time), call and tell my sister.  I couldn’t find my dad because he didn’t have his cell phone on him while running so the cops had to go driving around to find him.  It was all such a blur and so hectic that I never really had a chance to deal with it.  As time has gone by I realize how very lucky I am to have been with my mom in her last moments.  I could never have been the one to take care of her on a daily basis like my sister and my sister could not have handled waking up to her being dead.  I really feel like we did exactly what we were supposed to do and what we could each handle. 

When my mom wasn’t sick she was the most caring person I knew.  Most of my friends came to her to talk instead of their own moms.  She was such a cool mom, but not the kind that would let you drink with her or anything.  She had rules and you just didn’t break them.  You could tell her things and not feel silly.  She was the best shopping buddy ever.  We would go try on every outfit and never buy anything.  She cried at sad movies and commercials and tried to sing along with the radio using her "choir" voice.  She would get to talking and totally miss her exit while driving.  And speaking of driving, you think I drive badly??? Well I got it from her!!  She was just an extraordinary, beautiful lady.  She kept her fingernails so neat and pretty and had the most beautiful hands and feet.  She was so proper at times too….no burping at the dinner table or we had to put a quarter in the jar!  I loved having her braid my hair when it was long and at night before bed she would always play with my hair.  I know if she were alive today we would be the best of friends.  I get so profoundly sad when i see a woman my age with her mom out shopping.  I am really missing out on some great mother daughter time…..I think that makes me want to have kids even more so I can be like her and remember more about our times together. 

big sis all dressed up and girly!

big sis all dressed up and girly!